Tis the Season!

Welp, Its that time of year again kids. Time for Christmas lights, baking, ornament exchanges and holiday parties. Unfortunately for me and my family, its also a time of rememberance for Bud. I think my last post was actually about him on his birthday, ironic I guess. Bud passed away on December 27th when I was 21 years old. Right in front of me. In previous years this hasn't been as difficult, but given some extenuating circumstances, I'm feeling it a little bit more this year. I have been married for over a year now, I have this amazing man that I love more every single day and it still breaks my heart that they never met. I still sometimes think that Bud had something huge to do with the timing and me meeting Danny. I can't help but think it. Whenever I envisioned who I would end up in this life, it was always someone a lot like Mr. Smith. Danny proves to me daily that he is so much like him. I dont want this post to be so sad and dreary, but I did need to let a little of this saddness out. I miss him everyday.

On a second note: I dont think I've done an update since reaching my "goal weight". With that being said, holidays are impossible! With as much as I love to cook and bake, Im making it more difficult on myself. Lets see, what else has happened since my last post.

Miss Alicia got married. Its still weird for me to say her "husband" at times. I could not be happier for them and more relieved that my toast at the reception is over with. I was shaking like a leaf.

I went to visit a friend in Austin. That was a great time and all we did was shop and hang out. Didn't go out at all...which is surprising for Austin, TX.

I hosted my very first thanksgiving dinner at my home. I managed to make a beautiful turkey and some of the trimmings. I was SO stressed about that, I can't even explain it to you. Not to mention that my entire family was coming. Both sets of parents including my dad. I was so happy he came!

I have hosted my 5th annual ladies xmas brunch with my mom. I can't believe we have done this 5 times now. It was a pretty good turn out. I hope all the ladies had as much fun as I did.

I guess thats all I have for now. I'm doing my best to keep my emotions at bay and not let them get the best of me. I have to remember that he is always with me, even if I can't see him.

I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas and a very Blessed 2012!

Love you!

August 15, 1946

Ok this date, Harbert Smith Jr. was welcomed into this world. What an amazing man he proved to be. A man with so much love in his heart for others that is still astonishes me today. I was so very blessed to have had him as my stepfather for almost 9 years before he passed away. How truly lucky am I to have known him. There are many times when I miss him and wish he was here to see what my life has become, or how I wish that he would be here for my future children, because I know there is nothing that would have made him happier. I love him and miss him still and seeing as yesterday was his birthday, it only seems right to think of him a little more and share a little with you, whoever you are that reads this. With always the best stories and a way of talking to me like no one else could at the time, he was a best friend, an AMAZING parent and someone that I will always hold very closely in my heart.

To "My Bud", as I used to call him,....I love you always and you are always with me.

I am seriously missing someone today....

So...its been a while!

Hey there folks! I haven't posted on here in quite some time as you can tell. Lets see, what has changed.

1. Left QVL. - It was a beautiful romantic story but when it came right down to it...horrible fit for me

2. Started at MGM - Love it..couldn't be happier..and i have a 15 minute commute. Not too shabby.

3. I am now 6 lbs away from my original goal weight. This is very exciting for me. I'm wearing items I haven't been able to even think about wearing since college.

4. The hubs and I have almost been married for 1 year. It is insane to me how quickly time has flown by. We are planning a trip for our anny and its going to be absolutely amazing! I can't wait!

As it is coming up on June and half way through the year, lets look back at the new years resolutions.

#1: to lose weight...so far so good on this one. Weight Watchers is an amazing tool and I have definitely revamped my entire lifestyle.

#2: Worry less: I think I'm doing pretty well on this one.

#3: This is the last one: to find a church and actually start going. The first move has happened though. The boy has mentioned that he's started to get ready to start looking for our church home. This made me SO happy! So...I feel like we are in a good place on this one.

One Word

1)Where is your cell phone? on the charger next to me

2)Your hair? Brunette

3)Your mother? Strong

4)Your father? Rangers

5)Your favorite thing? punkin

6)Your dream last night? no clue

7)Your favorite drink? sweet tea

8)Your dream / goal? to be happy

9)What room are you in? office at work

10)Your hobby? working out?

11)Your biggest fear? losing someone i love

12)Where were you last night? Xd2

13)Something that you're not? confrontational

14)Muffins? Blueberry

15)Wish list item? no idea

16)Last thing you did? post on my WW message board

17)What are you wearing? dress

18)Friends? Amazing!

19)Your mood? Happy

20)Drinking? water

21)Your car? Maxine

22)Something you're not wearing? earrings

23)Your favorite home goods store? kirklands?

24)Your Favorite Color? Purple

25)Your favorite place to eat? Taste of italy

26)Favorite place I would like to be right now? Home with Danny

11 Pounds to Goal!

Good Morning! Can I just say that I am super excited after yesterday's weigh in. I definitely thought I was about to hit a plateau but I lost 3 more pounds. I am only 11 pounds away from my goal weight! I couldn't be more excited. I can definitely tell a difference in my body all over now. I'm hoping the pounds keep coming off at this rate!

On a different note: I'm assuming the drama at my mom's house has calmed down a little bit. I haven't seen my stepdad since everything happened and I'm pretty much ok with it. My brother seems to be afraid of him and I think that is a healthy fear. I would be too. He is not a small man. Mom says that at dinner this past week there was a little tension but nothing crazy happened which is good.

Kyle, Stephanie and Izzy came over on Saturday night. That might have been the 2nd highlight of my weekend. Isabelle has gotten so big and she is just so adorable. She is a little ball of personality when she is around people she feels comfortable with. Not to mention she is a gorgeous little girl. It was great to spend some time with my brother and Steph also. I feel like the only time we see them is holidays and birthdays and I really want to make a better effort at seeing them. Even if that means I have to drive to Roanoke more often. They are family. Thats all I have as of right now.

Oh...I could show you a face "before" and "where I am now" picture.

Before:



Where I am now:

Random Monday-ness

Welp, I haven't updated on here in a while so I figured it was time.

I have reached the 10 lbs lost mark which was really exciting and I got another manicure as a reward! I'm going to have to come up with something else for 15 lbs to make it a little more exciting. I didn't lose very much this week so that was a little discouraging and we are going camping this weekend which makes me a little nervous. (all the eating drinking and nothing else really). I do have a plan though. I've already purchased some plan friendly food items that will help me stick to it and I'm hoping I can make myself get up and run in the mornings. I'll definitely let you know if that happens.

Camping is definitely one of my all time favorite things that Danny and I do. It really is an amazing opportunity for us to get away from everything and just enjoy each others company and the company of the friends that go with us. We always come home so much more connected and refreshed. It really is GREAT! I wanna go right now! HAHA!

Speaking of getting away from it all....my family has to be one of the more dramatic families I know, but I think everyone feels this way about their families! haha! I think mine is exceptionally crazy because of one individual. Drama seems to follow him. Last night was probably the craziest I have seen things ever get and it truly scared me. I was afraid for peoples safety which is not really a feeling you want when you are with family. Peoples tempers went completely off the reservation and other people who I thought should have stepped up and said something at that moment, just sat there. It was surprising to me honestly and I couldn't stay in that situation. I had to leave. Needless to say, dinner at mom's house was not the same after everything went down. I dont want to go into too much detail because I dont know who reads this at all times, but it was just craziness. I'm going to look a few family members in a completely different light after all of that.

On another note: My bestest just had some surgery. She and I had a bit of a falling out just before it. I dont feel like its been completely resolved which is difficult for me, but I can't be selfish because right now I know she is struggling with the recovery process. I failed as a friend. That is all that can really be said about it. I feel awful about it and I hope she and I can mend that when she gets to feeling better. Please keep her in your prayers or positive thoughts for a speedy recovery.

Another thing I'm bummed about that isn't serious at all...Opening Day. I have gone to opening day at the ballpark every year since I graduated college. This has become somewhat of a tradition for me. I asked dad about it this year (I purchase my tickets so I'm not free-loading) and he basically said he could get a "limited amount of tickets". So does that mean I jsut dont get to purchase one? I LOVE opening day. Really kinda hacks me off that he is being like that. he's an employee, I know he'll get tickets because he does every year and every year I purchase from my dad. GRR! Is this spoiled of me?

zumba and Piyo are tongiht. Lets hope burning some calories can get my mind off the things I can't shut off in my head.